A sometimes comical and often dramatic character, Bates also has a profound way of translating scripture. This time, his delivery was rather awe-inspiring, almost dismal when explaining how you never can really tell what a man is going through judging by his outward appearance. As he further explained it, throughout the day, the face of the human soul may display a smile bright enough to illuminate the whole room, but under a blanket of darkness is dimmed by a pillow soaked with tears. Alone and away from the rest of the world, the mask is then removed, revealing untold grief in private.

Some people are able to conceal pain more than others. Even when vexed by a wounded spirit, they can still manage to laugh out loud in the public eye. Some have spent years building an internal levee strong enough to prevent a well of tears from gushing out in a flood.

The exterior of those who refuse to be read like an open book can lead observers into believing that everything is fine. There are no signs of sorrow to be seen and friends, family members and associates are clueless as to the intense emotional suffering occurring below the surface. Similar to a mirage, happiness is an image thrown forward, but standing far off into the distance where visibility is impossible to reach are naked feelings of pain and misery.

A cheerful conversation shared by two people can hide the fact that one of them has been sadly tormented by the loss of a dear loved one for many years. A pleasant moment with a co-worker at the office water cooler can muffle the screaming presence of severe depression until the shocking news of an apparent suicide is reported days later. And then there is the once placid prisoner who suddenly goes haywire, stabbing another prisoner to death without giving even the slightest warning.

Bates made it a point at the conclusion of his sermon to caution everyone on how we treat others. “Be careful,” he said, “you might pull a wretched spirit from out of isolation, from out of a hidden corner of the heart where it has laid hopelessly in fetal position, weeping in silent desolation.”

By Arthur Lee Hall, Jr.
Miami Times contributor

According to popular portrayals, the American family is a small unit that consists of a married husband and wife who have at least one biological daughter and one biological son.

However that ideal is not the way many U.S. households are now living.

According to a Pew Research Center survey, more than 40 percents of adults have either a stepchild, a step or half sibling or a stepparent. Among Blacks, at least 60 percent have at least one step relative.

“Blended families are very common in today’s world,” explained Miami-based marriage and family therapist Rafiah H. Prince. “This can be attributed to high divorce rate, separations, and people being open to finding love again.”

According to the Step Family Association, one  of the most important facts step-families must accept is that they must not try to impose “expectations and the dynamics of the intact or [nuclear] family onto the step family.”

Each blended family member will has their own histories and behaviors and each will thus act and respond in their own way. Having an idealized fantasy of how a parent or child believes their families should behave puts unnecessary pressure on individuals.

“We all want the storybook ending where everyone lives happily ever after. [But] be mindful that it may take time,” Prince said. “ All the love and hard work will pay off, but be aware that there will be challenges.”

Step families also face difficulties caused by not planning enough, poor communication and just moving too soon. Black blended families often have their own particular issues and concerns.

“Many Black families have estranged fathers, so when male figures enter the home and assume the role of Dad, there need to be clear definitions around what that means,” explained Prince. “The children have to adjust to the new roles in the home.”

Above all, Prince recommends that “open communication” is the best tool for blended families.

“It is important that all members be able to express their concerns and feel validated,” she said. “In addition, remember that for all members of the family that this is a “change” and with change you have to allow for adjustments.”

To ease some of the tensions that blended families face, Prince recommends that they attend family therapy sessions, visit www.blended-families.com or even just read “Smart Stepfamily: The Seven Steps to a Healthy Family” by Ron Deal.

By Kaila Heard
kheard@miamitimesonline.com

The Sports Brothers can be heard on WMEN 640 Sports radio. 

By The Sports Brothers 

Archimedean Charter, George Washington Carver Middle and Herbert A. Middle schools all ranked in the top 20 in all of Florida based on several factors that include added points derived from the Florida Comprehension Assessment Test [FCAT]. Assistant Principal Christina Briz at Archimedean Charter in West Kendall believes their middle school kids performed well because of special factors including implementing Saturday school often referred to as FCAT Camps. At the camps, teachers or even community leaders can volunteer on Saturday or after school to help students with test-taking skills and FCAT practice tests.

Extra help yields better scores 

“We have had Saturday school to prepare for the FCAT since the school first opened 10 years ago,” Briz said. “All of our students attend and teachers volunteer. If we need extra help, we go to one of our board members who is a college professor at Florida International University or our I.T who is a math teacher.”

As an incentive Brit allows teachers two personal days for teaching at Saturday school or for tutoring up to half a dozen students during teacher-planning days to help kids prepare for the state standardized exam.

“We have tutoring for 30 minutes every Monday through Thursday during school hours,” said Assistant Principal Shelton Rivers at George Washington Carver Middle school. Rivers noted that the school’s administrators target students’ weaknesses by monitoring each students’ previous FCAT scores. Carver does not have FCAT camps, but “our advanced courses are taught at a very high level and we meet the same academic criteria as all magnet schools,” Rivers said.

Greater challenges for inner city schools 

But sometimes it takes more than FCAT camps to help kids make the grade. Charles Drew Middle in Liberty City — also a magnet school— has held its Saturday FCAT Camps for the past several years. Nonetheless, last year only 18 percent of its sixth graders scored at or above math level. Officials from Charles Drew Middle were unable to comment before we went to press.

Dean of Discipline Phaion Hicks at Edison Middle School said he believes it will take more than FCAT camps for local inner city schools to catch up to our suburban counterparts.

“There are a lot of different variables that go into it such as parental involvement but the more contact you have with tutors and teachers the higher your test scores will probably be,” he said.

Thirty-four percent of Edison’s 6th graders scored at or above math level in 2011.

Hicks says Edison Middle does have Saturday FCAT tutoring and he can see small, but significant improvements within the student body. Miami Edison has recently gone from a “D” to a “C” school.

“I anticipate the test scores looking better than last year’s and hopefully our becoming a “B” school,” Hicks added.

By Latoya Burgess 
Miami Times writer 
latoyaburgess21@gmail.com  

“My layoff forced me into entrepreneurship,” she said. “It has been a great journey filled with blessings and challenges.”

TMG helps small business and not-for-profit organizations optimize profits by helping them attract grants, contracts and procurement opportunities. The firm also helps groups strengthen their public relations, community outreach and agency compliance efforts. During her time on the Super Bowl host committee, Minnis noticed many minority- and women-owned business could not take advantage of the opportunities set aside for them because they were not certified. This revelation gave her a mission and a customer base.

“Many of these aspiring businesses were not prepared and could not handle the capacity to work with these partners,” she said. “Our firm is here to help people understand the importance of compliance and gain access to and win the bidding process.”

Transforming no into yes 

Norma Kendall leads the South Florida-based Ann’s Janitorial Services, Inc. MTG helped transform the firm into a multi-million dollar full-service cleaning powerhouse.

“My company started with just me and my daughter,” Kendall said. “She [Minnis] helped me secure my certifications, licenses and helped develop my brand. Her work and care for me made the difference.”

TMG help the firm grow from two to 22 employees and secure several municipal; they provide janitorial services for Marlins Stadium.

Minnis says she has several creeds that she follows: 1) Know and understand your client’s expectations; 2) Even if you don’t have the capacity to get the job done by yourself, put together a team — premier vendors appreciate solid partnerships; 3) When you give your best to your clients, blessings come back to you.

By Zachary Rinkins

Miami Times writer 
zachary.rinkins@gmail.com

“I once did commercials and modeling gigs and rocked it in a size eight but I picked up a lot of weight after having three children,” said Passion “P-Say” Roosevelt, the show’s producer and creator. “I was one of the girls that all the guys wanted. Then I was suddenly sitting on the couch and my conversation kept focusing on women and weight.”

Eventually two close friends, DeLeon CoppaDon and Richard “Jiffy” Byrd, persuaded P-Say to get up and to use her creative skills. Together they put together a production that includes a fashion show, singing, speeches and spoken word. It’s taken them about a year to put the show together but the talented trio believe they have a winner on their hands.

Building self-esteem among “thick” sisters 

“It’s a real theatrical adventure that has never been coordinated in this manner,” she adds. “I wanted to do it with plus-size women because we are used to seeing shows that only feature small women. Even though I had picked up weight I still believed that I was beautiful and had worth. But so many other women and girls kept coming up to me and were discouraged because they were thick girls and felt that they didn’t fit society’s view of beautiful. That’s when I knew we had to do something to educate, empower and inspire plus-sized girls and women.”

According to P-Say, one of the things that have come out of the rehearsals for the show, is a bonding of the women and a kind of “family atmosphere.”

“It’s a great outlet for them because they know they can talk about their lives and dreams without being criticized or demeaned,” she said. “There is no end to the greatness that can from these women. Sometimes it’s hard to get them to go home after rehearsals — the positive energy is just that strong.”

The three producers are working on developing a program or  organization that is an extension of the show that they can take to others in the Black community, particularly youth.

“Young girls in their teens who are plus-sized kids are often really picked on by their peers,” P-Say said. “We have to help them love themselves and no be ashamed of who they are. From Miami and Jacksonville to Atlanta and beyond we want to plus-sized sisters to say, “color me thick.”

“Color Me Thick” begins at 7 p.m. and will also feature Lil Rock and Larry Dogg. For information call 786-355-4557. 

By D. Kevin McNeir

kmcneir@miamitimesonline.com 

Pastor Michael K. Bouie has led 10 congregations throughout Georgia and Florida in his pastoral career. But coming to Miami Gardens’ Mt. Hermon African Methodist Episcopal Church over a month ago proved to be a new experience even for this seasoned minister.

“The thing that stands out most about Mt. Hermon is that it is more diversified than many of the churches that I served and it is also younger than any of the churches that I served,” said the 52-year-old minister.

With a congregation of approximately 2500 members, the 60-year old church draws a variety of parishioners from senior citizens to the middle aged and young adult as well as youth members.

When asked how one church can meet such a diverse set of expectations and needs, Bouie replied, “It’s a challenge, but I think what makes it work is a continuing education about what each [group] brings to the table.”

He further explained, “If we ever stop appreciating the different generations, then we’re going to have problems.”

In June, the church will adopt the theme of “Generation Next,” and services and activities will be planned and executed by the church’s youth members.

The church also provides an all-boys charter school, the Richard Allen  Leadership Academy, as well as several popular ministries including outreach, youth and music.

Such activities are familiar to Bouie, who in addition to having a ministerial career that spans 30-plus years, also has been attending church regularly since he was a child.

“Unfortunately, my best church memory was during the days of segregation in Miami because at that time the church provided more fellowship opportunities than we do today,” he explained. “It kept the church strong because we needed the fellowship to bind us together and keep us abreast of what was going on in the community.”

However, “I’m not saying that times are not good nowadays, but now churches have to work to [teach] that belief that we are responsible for each other since we just don’t have segregation to deal with,” he said.

A faith of encouragement

Most times when Bouie is behind the pulpit, he finds himself passing along messages meant to offer encouragement to everyone. The minister even started “Majestic Inspiration,” regular emails he sends to over 3000 subscribers that offer biblical and sometimes personal lessons about hope.

The pastor also provides his insight and services to other churches and ministries with his consulting business where he is frequently called upon to offer leadership training.

“A lot of time, pastors don’t devote as much time on the development of the persons we bring into leadership and I think in many churches people learn with on the job training,” he said. But, “the church is starting to get away from that thinking where the pastor is wearing all of those hats and I think today [churches are] more respectful of the gifts of others.”

Mt. Hermon AME Church is located at 17800 NW 25th Avenue in Miami Gardens.

by Kaila Heard
kheard@miamitimesonline.com

This year the 44th annual Pink Tea’s theme will be “Harmony of the Arts: A Youthful Celebration” and features artists from Miami Northwestern Senior High School’s Performing and Visual Arts Center (PAVAC), dancers from the New World School of the Arts and the SWA performance ensemble.

The Pink Tea consciously chose to highlight youth performers, according to Victoria Beatty, the 44th annual Pink Tea’s chairwoman.

“In light of Trayvon Martin and in light of incidents that really dim the light of the young, we wanted to create an event that celebrated youth in South Florida,” Beatty explained. “We say a ‘Harmony of the Arts’ because we wanted to show the synergy between drama, music and dance and how it’s the young Black folks in South Florida that have really captured true art.”

The prominent Pink Tea was inspired by a similar event hosted in Illinois. The tradition was established in Miami’s Church of the Open Door by a former pastor, Harold Long, in 1969.

Since then the celebration has grown in popularity and prominence and has attracted such national figures such as Maya Angelou, as well as local celebrities, in years past.

“The Church of the Open Door is located in the heart of Liberty City and [the Pink Tea] is a way to open doors to the neighborhood and bring the community together,” Beatty said.

The Church of the Open Door’s senior pastor is the Rev. Joaquin Willis.

The 44th annual Pink Tea for the Church of the Open Door, 6001 N.W. 8th Avenue in Miami, will begin at 4 p.m. on Saturday, May 20th. 

By Kaila Heard
kheard@miamitimesonline.com